RISK: Deloousional Edition

[dokyun]

You cannot use certain BBCodes: [ roll].

Well shit, @Maypews better fix this. In any case I rolled an 8 with 3d6.

We're going to establish our capital in the Eastmost tip of Afghanistan, Outer Heaven. I'm going to take the top end of Pakistan that sits between us and the Mongols, then take the rest of Afghanistan.

I figure the 2nd Mongol Empire is going to want to expand North so there's no need for us to fight over territory.

[Maypews]

Turn 1 - 2nd Mongol Empire (+0)

The 2nd Mongol Empire, led by the mad Baron von Ungern, was established in 1917. The Khanate had repelled the invaders out of Mongolia, and now that it's independence was secure it began to look abroad routes of expansion. Too weak to face China proper in it's current state, it decided to head westwards, just as it's forebearer did. Breaking it's isolation caused the Baron to come into contact with many pecuilar peoples and cultures, especially that of Zanzibar Land with it's noted wild cat populace.

As of now, the top goal of the Empire is to unify the steppe. As such, the Baron ordered his forces to expand further into Xinjiang and Central Asia, with spills* going to Nepal and Kryzyzyzygzgyzgstan (whoops, I stuttered.) The Baron has also seen the ruler of Zanzibar land's proposal and agrees that it is acceptable.

* = "Spills" is a term used to denote where leftovers of a rule go. I.E. if you say "Fill Germany" with your roll, you'd then designate the spills to go to Denmark if your roll ends up being too powerful for your statedgoal. This is good practice so that the OP doesn't have to fill in your remaining territories at random

[Maypews]

You cannot use certain BBCodes: [ roll].

Well shit, @Maypews better fix this. In any case I rolled an 8 with 3d6.

We're going to establish our capital in the Eastmost tip of Afghanistan, Outer Heaven. I'm going to take the top end of Pakistan that sits between us and the Mongols, then take the rest of Afghanistan.

I figure the 2nd Mongol Empire is going to want to expand North so there's no need for us to fight over territory.

Yeah okay I just figured out the issue. Basically just like, don't try to insert it into your post inline by clicking on the green icon. Once you've got a roll there just hit submit. Not sure why it cant be inserted inline but as long as the roll shows it's fine. Ignore the extra roll I added for testing purposes to this post haha, you can only roll once per turn of course.

Edit: As an FYI, new players can still join. If you do join, please tell me your actions and roll for your first turn as well. Also I will make sure to give each turn 24 hours until advancement. I can't promise to update the map every day at the same time like a machine, but I'll always err on the side of caution and wait longer so that everyone can get their turns in instead of advancing quickly.

rolls.PNG (21.54 KiB) Viewed 106 times

[Parzival]

tbh not really sure what I'm doing but I rolled an 18 and according to the map I have a bonus of 10, not sure exactly what that entails but I'm gonna just expand radially. All of Russia will be mine, yes, she will be mine.

[Parzival]

Or? Did I fuck up the rolling?

[Maypews]

Or? Did I fuck up the rolling?

It seems like you accidentally added two rolls to your post. I'll just take the first one in the order, no biggie. I'll see if I can set it so that you only roll one per post, but you can also just delete the extra roll yourself.

tbh not really sure what I'm doing but I rolled an 18 and according to the map I have a bonus of 10, not sure exactly what that entails but I'm gonna just expand radially. All of Russia will be mine, yes, she will be mine.

Bonuses work in that you only get it once you've fully filled in the country according to the borders on the map. It's meant to be a reward of sorts for expanding and also to dictate your longterm strategy in what countries you want to aim for. Typically bigger bonuses (like Russia) take longer to fill in because they're for larger nations. On turn 1, nobody has a bonus yet. Take a look at my country on the initial turn; this is a bonus of +0

turn2mongolia.png (57.4 KiB) Viewed 73 times

However, following my most recent turn (which we haven't advanced to yet but I already filled in some of the map for it), I filled in Xinjiang as well as Nepal and Tajikistan. So while on the first map I had no bonus, this is now a bonus of +3 per the map. Meaning I get 3 territories added to all of my subsequent rolls. So accordingly I will add it in my posts, with the "Turn 1 - 2nd Mongol Empire (+0)" turning into "Turn 2 - 2nd Mongol Empire (+3)". Dokyun also now has a bonus of +1 since he filled Afghanistan. Currently, even after your most recent turn, your bonus would still be 0 since you have not filled in Russia yet.

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[Maypews]

By the way, @dokyun, the Baron wonders if it would be okay for him to take your two stray territories in Tajikistan. I think we had somewhat of a miscommuncation there; like, it seems like you wanted to start in that Afghanistani panhandle thing, but since you start with 5 I just coloured in the general area there.

Mongolia may be interested in signing a NAP, depending on how we are to handle this. You could conquer the Indian subcontinent, while we take Central Asia and Persia. That is sort of how I am envisioning our potential spheres of influence in the future. We would also pledge not to involve ourselves in Arabia in any such agreement so that you will have a sea route and aren't surrounded/trapped by us, though Egypt may have designs on that territory. But the long and short of my proposed agreement is basically as follows.

sphereofinfluence.png (272.36 KiB) Viewed 65 times

[dokyun]

By the way, @dokyun, the Baron wonders if it would be okay for him to take your two stray territories in Tajikistan. I think we had somewhat of a miscommuncation there; like, it seems like you wanted to start in that Afghanistani panhandle thing, but since you start with 5 I just coloured in the general area there.

Mongolia may be interested in signing a NAP, depending on how we are to handle this. You could conquer the Indian subcontinent, while we take Central Asia and Persia. That is sort of how I am envisioning our potential spheres of influence in the future. We would also pledge not to involve ourselves in Arabia in any such agreement so that you will have a sea route and aren't surrounded/trapped by us, though Egypt may have designs on that territory. But the long and short of my proposed agreement is basically as follows.
sphereofinfluence.png

No, what you did is actually fine. Zanzibar Land is said to be centered in that area, bordering Pakistan, China and the former Soviet Union (Tajikistan).

It's true that our leader, Big Boss has had his watchful eye over the Gulf after assimilating Afghanistan, and plans on expanding into the Indian subcontinent for easy access. However, it might take us a while to get there and we also want to wait and see what Egypt is planning.

Since we already control 2/3 of Tajikistan you'd just be depriving us of a bonus if you took it, some people would read that as an act of aggression. But since we're partly businessmen, we'll try and cut you a deal: let us keep Tajikistan and we won't bother you to the North. Go ahead and take Turkmenistan and Uzbekistan, but stay out of Iran for now. It'd be entrapping if either of us moved in, and I think it's better to keep Iran as a buffer zone while we wait and see what Egypt is doing, so let's not move too fast. You still have Kazakhstan to conquer, anyway.

[capstasher]

(not all of them will be this long, apologies)
Ryder Rowe was a regular man, rural, simple, kept his head down and worked hard. He didn't wish for much in life, and knew nothing would be handed to him easy. All he ever wanted was to see the Great Pyramid of Memphis, TN. Dropped out of high school and began working as a mechanic in his uncle's garage. Each month, he set aside a part of what he earned so that one day he could go see the great shining Tomb of Doom. As soon as he turned 18 he gathered his savings and got himself a car.

The car was in a rough state, an old beat up 1988 Ford Ranger XLT SuperCab. But God damn it, it was his. For a year he worked to get it back to working order, ended up spending nearly as much getting it fixed as he did on the truck itself. It would've been more if it weren't for him doing the repairs himself. Well, he did a bit more than repairs. You see, the engine was totally busted. That's how he managed to gather the money for it in the first place. Instead of replacing it with the same engine, he decided to MacGyvor in a diesel engine instead, since "Them there Iraqis raising our oil prices". (oh yeah this is 2004 btw, he would have been wearing the same Bush Cheney 2004 t-shirt Misha wore in Katawa Shojou when he said this, but the Bush didn't start campaigning yet)

Our Ryder had a plan, he got a working diesel engine from a scrapyard for (relatively) cheap, installed it in his Ford Ranger, and spent quite a good sum making sure everything else would work just fine once he fed it his concoction. Apart from brewing his own alcohol, Ryder decided to brew his own biodiesel for his car. Quite a simple recipe of animal fat, alcohol, lye, and potassium hydroxide. Brewery teaches you chemistry through practice, so it all came quite natural to him.

Apr. 21, 2004 Around 6 PM CDT.
Work on the truck is complete. No more clanking, no more rattling. Seems the last fix did the job for the strange stutter it had on ignition, too. That settles it. tomorrow morning, Ryder Rowe would be the first of his family to see the Memphis Pyramid. He hitched his trailer (he lived in a trailer on his parent's property, It's not like he was trailer trash or anything. His father had this strange conception that "A man ought to have his own castle" and got Ryder a trailer as a temporary place until he got his own home), and tucked in to sleep.

Apr. 22, 2004 Around 5 AM CDT. Cairo, TN
The journey from Cairo, TN, the small unincorporated community Ryder lived in, to Memphis, TN would take around 4-5 hours. He decided he would set off quite early to see the pyramid in it's full shining beauty. And before dawn even broke, Ryder was off, driving his Ford Ranger with his trailer hitched to the back, on the highways of Tennessee. However a nasty storm seemed to be abrewin'

Apr. 22, 2004 08:40 AM CDT. Oakville, TN
Ryder pulls into a small diner in Oakville, just East of Memphis. He overhears some truckers speak of an accident further down route 64. He decides it would be best to avoid that. He can't let a small accident delay his excitement. But as excited as he may be, Ryder begins getting cold feet. You see, he built everything up to this moment. He would get into Memphis and finally see the Pyramid. Then what? Well, he was planning to stay a few days, that's why he brought his trailer, but long term, what would be next? Well, home, I guess. He would return to the garage, he would keep working. Maybe, one day, his uncle would pass the garage down to him. He'd have a son of his own which he would pass down the garage to. Well the garage is doing decently well, and its not like there are a lot of businesses in Cairo. He could probably get some more customers through the door than his (rather abrasive) uncle. Hell, the garage might even grow to be the best business in Cairo. Picture that! Ryder Rowan, King of Cairo! Enough of the delusions. Let us focus on the task. We're losing precious time. Ryder pays for his food and heads out the door. He's gonna take his Ford Ranger down some side roads to avoid the accident, and he'll make up for the time he spent daydreaming that way.

Apr. 22, 2004 09:25 AM CDT. Fishlake, TN.
A tornado briefly touched down in the extreme eastern part of Shelby county. One house had some shingle damage and second home had a window blown out. A horse trailer was blown about 40 feet and a pickup truck was pushed about 25 feet. Several trees were knocked down. One pickup truck vanished without a trace...

[capstasher]

???. ??, ???? ??:?? ?? ???. Memphis?
Well he somehow made it, in some way, to Memphis. But just exactly which Memphis did he make it to? This place seems quite a bit less... urban?... than he imagined. It was a lush oasis, while behind him lay only desert. Now Ryder has heard of food deserts on the TV but he didn't think they meant literal ones. He pulls his truck to the side, next to one of the many white plastered buildings, and heads out to ask some locals for directions.

"'Scuse me mister, you wouldn't happen to know where the Pyramid is?"
The two men he approached look at each other in utter confusion. They mumble to each other in an unintelligible language.
"Damn foreigners.. should have known by the weird clothes they were wearin'..." And weird they were, well, if anything, around these parts it was Ryder that was the one dressed strangely. "PY-RA-MID. You know, the big glass thing!" He explains while trying to draw a pyramid in the air.
The men's confusion slowly turns to anger. They begin shouting and approaching Ryder while gesticulating wildly.
You don't need to know what they are saying to understand this likely means trouble. Neither does Ryder. He retreats to his car and locks the door. The two, however, did not relent. From their sides, they removed some long curved swords of sorts and began banging them against the window. But Ryder was no quitter, and he was not gonna flee a fight against some ne'er-do-well foreigners. He picked up his shotgun from behind the seat, loaded in a few shells, and smashed the first guy in the face with the car door. Once out, he fired off a warning shot in the air. That was enough to scare both the men who first assaulted him and all the other people around. But today just was not Ryder's day.

Multiple men on horseback encircled Ryder and a few others tackled him to the ground. All men quite tan, except for one, dressed all in black with a quite pale face, standing further back watching this unfold from his horse. One of the men begins tying his horse to Ryder's Ford, looping the tether around the front grill. One tug from the horse and the grill would be ripped off.
"Fuck, man, I don't think this is Memphis... Hell, I don't even think I'm in America anymore. It ain't Mexico or Canada either. Where the hell did I end up?" he mumbles to himself. Ryder locks his eyes on the pale fella sitting in the back "Well he looks a good deal like my uncle, and we all got some Italian in us... NO CAVALLI, NO CAVALLI!"
The man at the back shouts something, and the horse is untied from the truck. He crouches down next to Ryder and asks "Latine loqueris?"
"What in the... Latine, Latin, well Italians are some sort of Latin I guess, SI, SI!" Ryder answers with a confused nod.
"Si raeda tua equis non utatur, ostende mihi quomodo movearis." The pale man replies, pointing to the pickup truck. He shouts something to his men and they release him, giggling amongst themselves.
"Movearis.. movearis.. Oh you want to see me move it? Yeah I'll show you" Ryder climbs into the Ford and starts the ignition. The engine comes to life, and Ryder slowly drives it in a semicircle around the back of the group. All the laughter falls silent. The pale man shouts over the engine noise "EUGE, PEREGRINUS! Ostende mihi quomodo tonantem cum clava tua facias!". He picks up Ryder's shotgun off the ground and points at it.
"Oh you wanna know about the gun? Gimme that, I'll show ya." He stops the car and gets the shotgun from the pale man, cocks it, and looks around for a target. He finds a now abandoned stall of watermelons off some 20 feet away. He points at them and shouts: "Watch!"

One shot, most of the melons turn to red mist. "Valde bona, peregrine! Valde bona! Te, peregrine, volo me in praelio jungere. Ego rebellionem Byzantinam contra soldanum Aegypti duco."
"Rebelion? You a rebel? What you're wantin' to fight the Arabs? Uhh.. Non soldato, non combattente. No can't do sir, not me. I only came here to see the Pyramid"
"Pyramidis? Venisti huc ut Pyramidem Memphitici? Rebellionis meae pars fiat, et melius tibi pyramides quam illa ostendam."
"Pyramidis.. Memphitici... Uhh.. Yeah! Si, si! Wait, rebellion, no, no! No rebel. No rebellionis. I just want to see the damn pyramid."
"Si rebellionem non admiseris, hic morieris." the pale man says, drawing his thumb across his neck in an exaggerated motion. "Pyramidem vides, aut morieris. Arbitrium tuum."
"So you want me to become some rebel soldier for you against the Iraqis, and you'll let me finally see the pyramid, or you kill me here? Well fuck, it's not like I love them Arabs, and I doubt I have enough shots to take out more than two of you left in this thing... Pyramid it is. Pyramidem, Pyramidis, whatever you call it."
"Bona electio. Quod tibi nomen est, peregrine?"
"Nomen, nomen... You're asking me my name? Ryder. Ryder Rowe" he says, pointing to himself.
"Riderow, hac nocte oppugnaturi sumus. Praepara te."